Making it Fancy

 

I love birds, little animals and bugs. Since my winter garden has been crap, they right now are my temporary focus. My favorite thing to do is feed them so they come to me when I walk outside my house and open my arms like Snow White.

I bought a couple Dollar Tree store bird feeders and fancied those bitches up. The only negative is I put them on my porch to close to the door and the humming birds want to fight us every time we come home. I guess we interrupt there sucking of the sweet nectar. I can’t count the amount of times I’ve felt the tiny tip of a beak graze my face or a feather hit my actual eyeball.

I took regular feeders and fake flowers. I cut the flowers into pieces, so I could fit them around the hard-plastic yellow flowers attached to feeders.

 I glued everything down with hot glue.

This is nectar recipe I used:

https://www.dominosugar.com/baking-tips-how-tos/hummingbird-nectar-recipe

Domino® Sugar Hummingbird Nectar Recipe
1 cup tap water
¼ cup Domino® Granulated Pure Cane Sugar
To make your own mixture, bring tap water to a boil and stir in Domino® Granulated Pure Cane Sugar. Allow mixture to cool to room temperature before adding it to your feeder.
To yield larger portions, mix at the ratio of 1-part sugar to 4 parts water. The solution will keep in the refrigerator for up to two weeks.

***I did not use Domino sugar. I used this brown looking organic one***

There’s another recipe using orange peels that gives it a great color I will be trying in the future.

I attached a go pro camera to the feeder direactly and got shitty footage. I attached again to the beam on the porch instead and perfect. The humming bird’s wings look almost translucent from moving so fast. I love there lil chirps!!!!!

 

 

D I fucking Y

How’s my winter garden? Horrible!!!!!! Compared to last year I guess. Also compared to summer when everything seems to grow with no end or burn to hell. I do have a tray of leaks a pile of random lettuce and radishes growing, that’s great but I want more. More I tell you. But since my garden is eh I’m going to do a diy. I did can food planters last year, they were amazing. So I will be redoing full detail 😊 yesss.

Your probably thinking isn’t that the same place you put dirt into your cans? Why yes, yes it is. Make sure you dust your multi-purpose area off or you’ll get paint and dirt every ware. I had to re dust a million x5 because dirt just kept magically appearing. Now for the steps to ensure a fantastic looking piece of up cycled cannery.

Step one: Naked your cans. No! find the cans your going to use from the pile you have stocked up for this purpose and make sure they are clean. Last year I half assed them thinking well I’m just going to put dirt in them anyway shouldn’t be to bad. Yes it was bad, I grew hair mold instead of spices. EW.

Step two: Now naked your cans and use a wire scrapper to get any left-over label and glue off

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Now I really love multicolor cans, this year I’m going to try and be more clean and precise. Last year I sprayed all willy nilly. This year I’m about those crisp ass lines, so I bought some painters tape.

side note: I will not be popping holes into the bottoms. I will layer with rocks. I don’t want the water draining through. If you want holes thin nail and a hammer will do 🙂

Step three: Do your first color coat. I am going to try and stick with just a few colors keep it garden chic like all these fancy pants magazines. But do what you want 😊. Wait a few hours until the paint is dry before you do painters tape. I’m impatient as hell I peeled bits of my base layer off not waiting long enough☹. (looks pretty dam cool still)

Step four: Next color. Make sure you put enough tape and press the edges down so the color doesn’t seep into the other color. As you can see I did not follow my own instructions.

 

I spray painted a few bugs to glue onto my cans. I thought it would be dam cute and it is.

I’m done with the cans they seem bland as hell and boring like a just water soup☹ Soooooo I’m going to ad stencils to some. I really do like my bug cans they are cute as fuck. But I need a pop of color in my soul. So back to spraying all willy nilly. I will still be doing crisp ass lines. I used painters tape and stencils to only use part of stencil or to only paint a certain color on part of the can ahhhhhhhhhhhh love it. I got the stencils at Michaels use your coupon I find them a bit pricy.

NEXT:

Some perler bead flowers to label your plants or make signs for the bastard cat shitting in your garden.

I shaped petals out one by one since my perler bead stencils aren’t the ones I need for this project. They still came out well but needed extra work.

1: lay out pattern

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2: Iron and I know this sounds easy but I didn’t read the directions. I figured anyone with at least ¼ a brain could do this very easy step and then I ended up with perlers as flat as the earth is round. So press the stencil equal pressure not to long not to short depending on the heat of your iron.

3: cut out some fabric circles glue your petals on. You could also glue them onto a big button I don’t know why I didn’t think of that earlier.

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4: Melt a single perler end and glue to the end of a wooden BBQ skewer and there we go a perfect lil stem. Now glue that stem to the back of your flower.

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5: Get some paper, writing implement of your choice, scissors and tape. Write out your garden message, plant label, note to nosey neighbors, whatever de stresses your life and cut out. Press tape over front and back making it waterproof and cut out again. Glue on direactly or use a bit of garden twine and there you go. Beautiful flowers with dainty magical caring or blunt note ❤

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Hope you enjoy

Another side note:

I didn’t realize so much red paint was splattering on my arms from can painting. Later in day I saw what looked like a rash and web md it now I’m dying I have rubella. I have rashes from other countries noooooooo why me whhhyyyyyyy. Then I remembered my spray paint cap was faulty and it’s just paint I’m fine. But be careful web md will make you feel like you need to be quarantined instead of just hosed off.

The imposter.

All raised beds are ready. I’m going to layer my dirt then start sectioning off with cotton cord and small nails. I figure after I section off add plants remove cording, I could use the cord and nails to make a little DIY trellis for the plants to crawl up on if needed. I’m moving plants closer together this year. I’m stapling this lil green trellis on as well. I was going to go all out and do the whole chicken wire cover so my dogs don’t jump in but I don’t have that kind of patience at the moment. I’m taking 17 units this semester and its killing me. I will staple, glue and throw fairy dust whatever needs fixing right now.

I found this trunk in a storage locker I bought and I was going to refurbish it. I left it in the rain and the lid got super warped. I was going to dump it along with the tree I chopped down then I looked at it, really looked and thought artichokes plants would look so fucking cute hanging out of it if it were painted gold <3. So I painted the trunk gold. I know I should have sanded it down first but I wanted the authentic I fought a family of raccoons next to prostitutes in an alley for this trunk look.   20160127_133345

I also have this chair that’s just been siting there withering away. I looked at a few garden chairs on google images and decided I would just cut out the bottom and replace it with a burlap piece. I used thick scissors to cut the wicker seat out and tack nails to hold the burlap in place. I then placed soil in the burlap and watered it to make sure it would hold. It held pretty fine no complaints. I put flower seeds I was going to buy flowers but decided I wanted to do from seed to finish this year.

On a side note I share this with tears in my gardening soul……….

I’ve realized I’ve been providing fertilizer and heat for a weed for the past three months. This imposter has been sucking up my nourishment like a baby to a mother’s teat. I thought I planted strawberry seeds, well I did. This plant grew so fast compared to the rest, I was so proud de-weeding its soda bottle home (pretty much killing its cousins) measuring its wonderful growth compared to its siblings, who btw are real fucking strawberries. Last week while watering it my finger hit the weed and it stung me I thought maybe it’s a defense mechanism against not fully mature plant eating monsters. I don’t know how I confused the two they look waaaaaayyy different. So I officially have snipped it, rid myself of the roots and started strawberry seeds again. The weed could have grown due to the fact that I reused soil. So far the only weed to grow out of reused stuff but the garden beds haven’t sprouted anything unwanted yet. On other news my cilantro plant is budding with flowers to provide me with seeds. I have made tons of salsa and garnish plenty of plates with this one plant I’m really excited to start seeding it. It will be my first time collecting seeds from one of my plants.

The WEED

The REAL berries (see the size difference)

lil diyish

After cleaning my growing area again, freaken bunny dragging plastic from who knows ware every ware, I add compost to my old soil and then bagged soil to that. I mixed it all in these round tubs with this tiny shovel I found in the rocks at the beach. I started going through my seeds again. Plotting ware they will go after I sprout them in the green house to get an early start on my garden. I separate by type: tomatoes with tomatoes, peas with peas etc. I remember I spilled water on about 40 dollars worth of seed paper packets last year ruining them. So I took the seeds out the packets of ones I knew I would use and put them in plastic baggies. You can just put the whole seed packet in plastic bag then in your box. My box is small I decided I would just open my packets get rid of the extra paper. I tossed it on the bottom of my garden beds to biodegrade.

I will be doing my spices in canned food cans again this year. I will spray paint the cans at least enough to get a good surface to write what plant it is. Last year the sun bleached all my marker off and I played a guessing game between lemon basil, regular basil and every dam kind of basil I grew. Shocker didn’t use basil all last year. I will this year though, I found a bad ass spaghetti sauce recipe I want to try, will post if turns out delicious. Still post if turns out like crap no better way to learn then trial and error or someone else’s mistakes ha.

I washed my cans out and took the labels off. I used a hammer and nail to pop drainage holes on the bottom and another hole on the top of can to add a little hanging string. I did the side hole over a piece of wood. I kept bending the can without it under there. I saw one online with 3 holes to make a full on plant hanger super cute maybe I’ll do some for flowers I’ll keep yea posted. Fuck it I am do it. I need holders for those bug repellant flowers.

 

I made a soda bottle hanging garden last year was so fucking cute I’m going to make again this year and more. I quit the soda habit like 3 months ago. Congrats to me still going through withdrawals, nipples get hard every time I see a can of warm coke sitting in hot car omg mmmmm.

I bought all these supplies at the Bc 99 store the rope was like 1.69 washers 1 .35 and these bottles I scavenged from any ware. I used an old food thermometer to punch holes into the plastic bottle one on each side top and bottom after I heated it up on the open flame. You could use a soldering gun, I couldn’t find mine today. I also heated the end of the rope so it wouldn’t fray after I cut if off since it tries to separate when pulling through the soda bottle holes, I just eyed it to what I thought was level the tied a washer. I know I didn’t wash the soda out this bottle. Maybe I’ll get some obese plants with all this sugar, will see.

There’s a lot of snails and slugs trying to set up a living space in my greenhouse, so Ima go brujeria and put a line of salt at the front door. My vegetarian friend, I will not name any names tried to scold me last year for drowning the snails all “its inhumane” all this shit. Then I reminded her how I caught her eating pork posole 3 o clock in the fucking morning at a sleep over at my house when we were like 15 lol. Take that bitch.

Last years soda bottle garden still going strong. I think there’s a weed growing under the cilantro bottle one I thought I planted strawberries but it doesn’t look like it now.