The start.

So I told myself last year that I would have this huge garden, a garden that would rival the Garden of Eden. My backyard is smaller then an inmate on death row personal play area so even though I knew that wasn’t going to happen I had high expectations. I bought this amazing green house on eBay I’m going to say 89.99 give or take five bucks. All the supplies I found free on the side of the road (what a fking steal) and I bought some dirt.

It started out magically my neighbor moved out and left a bounty of free items such as plastic tubs, a foldable cabinet which is holding my tubs and various items I took even though I didn’t need because… secret…..I’m a hoarder. So I placed the cabinet into my green house like so and took soldering iron and made drainage holes in my tubs.

I was ready for this life this green no more grocery stores, fuck you organic priced veggie life. I started all my seeds in the green house they were doing great. I made some wooden plant thing a ma bobs which did set me back 75 bucks. I was sad but I really needed them to keep my dogs out of my plants. Turns out my dogs don’t care and just climbed on the raised beds with there long limbs and tore out all my seedlings. It was fine, I started plenty of seedlings so I could share them with my co workers and family. This time I added metal trellis so no one could disturb them. My garden was doing just as I imagined they would under my semi green thumb, my pea plants crawling up to 4 ft. high, my jalapeno has given me two whole chilies, my turnips looking fucking amazing, My bush peas bushy, the corn just everything was great until I was gifted a rabbit. I put him on the side of the house. He had his own door, a tree for shade, sun spot everything, lil hut fresh food and water every lil bunny’s paradise. But he’s an extremely selfish animal and that wasn’t enough. Long story short I looked out my window and saw that lil bastard in my garden. I went outside put him back in his area stuck rocks in the hole he made to prevent further security breaches. The garden looked fine. He did crap on some of the beds that was it or so I thought.

I begin harvesting my bounty of Snap peas off my long 5 ft. plant two hands full into these crisp light green two and a half inch long shells I find that bunny ass had chewed the bottom of the plant, snapped every vine that had jack and the bean stalk up into the air. In other words he murdered my plant didn’t, even eat the good parts. I turn to all my plants it was the same a killing field of food, tall and short even the jalapeno (I hope it burned his ass on the way out). So I restarted a lil late in the season El Nino gave us to much sun ruined my life. I harvested in all: six potatoes, 3 heirloom tomatoes, 2 cherry tomatoes, 5 jalapenos, a bunch of basil (guess rabbits don’t like basil) a few squash, a pumpkin, three sunflowers that I dried for my cocktails and that was it.

O I forgot I had an infestation of tiny green moths in the green house that killed off the turnips, chives and every spice I had planted. I couldn’t figure out what was eating my plants due to them being the exact same color as every leaf they perched their fat asses on. This year I’m prepared.

So hopefully you follow me on my new garden journey. I’ll start off by cleaning my backyard making room for my new and improved garden. I will be putting tips what worked for me, what didn’t, stuff that made things easier and posting tons of pics of the bounty I hopefully get this time keep your fingers crossed.

These are pictures from last years fruitful garden attempt.

4 thoughts on “The start.

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  1. Haha your blog is to funny I love it. You have to get that little bastard that keeps punking your bunny lol. I hate going to Lowe’s and home depot I always see nasty mice there. Keep up the good work on the gardening 😁😁😁✌️✌️✌️


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