I think I finally did it. I left something in my front yard long enough for someone to steal it. My life partner Paul told me to stop leaving stuff out. But as the main food grower in this house I do what I dam want. So now my heavy duty loopers are gone (those long branch cutters). I had to use a baby hack saw to clear enough space to reach my neglected and heavy black pots. I got them for free in someone’s yard a few years ago and have maybe planted in them twice. Once the bushes grew over them, I pretended they didn’t exist.

I keep digging my carrots up. They are not ready, but I want to see them. There taking too long to grow I want to visibly monitor their progress. This is probably why their tops are so huge and the carrot is like a baby worm.

Today is just a fucking day of omg look! omg I grew this! omg what the hell is that!!! and whhhhyyyyy wwwhhyyyyyyy????

The leaks I planted last year decided to grow this year to full size. Now that I’m a professional leak grower I get ask a lot of questions like……….I don’t ..I don’t get asked. Ask me! assskkkk!

Growing leeks without knowing will now be listed as one of my many professional garden accomplishments, along with not screaming at my shovel to dig better. (baby steps)

Step 1: Ignore them. Clearly, they are attention whores and do not grow while you watch. Instead they grow in one full spurt. So, you over douse them with eyes at the end.

 Step 2: Let them starve for attention, water, sun, and nutrients.

Bam soon as your attention is gone, they will want it so bad they will be the size of a ruler. So maybe they thrive on neglect? not attention. Either way they grew that is all that matters now. There will be leek soup all winter. That is all I really know to do with them.

We are supposed to have rain. I love walking in the rain. When I want to walk in the rain not when I’m going to the grocery store or getting something out of my car, going to work, etc. It must be under my circumstances.

I need to clean my yard. Every season I say this is the time I’m going to clean as I go. I will pull out a dead ass plant and toss it into the compost. Use up a soil bag and toss the bag in the trash. Open my garden tools, toss out all the packaging. Yet this season and seasons passed I just toss everything to the floor. There’s cement all over my back yard you wouldn’t know with all the spilled potting soil everywhere and plastic bags galore flying in the wind like lil ghost.

I’m excited every season to get my garden life together this time for sure

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